Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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