Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
