Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
