Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
is wine microwaveable?
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
