Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Randomize
