This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
