If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
