Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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