I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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