i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
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