what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
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