Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
