Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Liz is crying about burritos again.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
