Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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