We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
