So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
