Tell her she can't have a vagina
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
my liver is dry heaving
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
