one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
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