Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
