why do cheetos always look like penises
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
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