Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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