Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Randomize
