there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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