So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Randomize