Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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