There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
the room spins SO much faster in panama
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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