If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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