party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
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