Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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