dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I had to cum in my sink.
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