Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
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