do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I smell like Dick and happiness
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize