i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
