playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
