I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize