I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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