Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
