Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Randomize
