all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Let's paint friendship bongs
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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