I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
