well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize