I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
