Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Randomize
