well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
