i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
