i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
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