dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Randomize
