Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
