So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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