i think i have herpe
just one?
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
